How to Relieve Stress of Caring for an Aging Parent: Amy O’Rourke at TEDxOrlando
O’Rourke talks about common challenges that come with caring for aging parents. She makes the statement that the main struggles of caretakers are denial of reality rather than acceptance.
Kids want the parents to go backwards, they want them to get to where they were, and they miss where they are (O'Rourke, 2012).
In this quote, she is talking about a patient whose daughter is visiting and wants her to be working out to stay healthy. The patient only wants to enjoy life, seeing movies. O’Rourke goes into five main points: accept aging as a reality, avoid “role reversal”, understand the impact of healthcare settings, recognize that aging is a one-way process, and view caregiving as a lifestyle change.
I’ve come up with three areas that I think deserve attention. One is the denial of reality, the second is knowing some basic ground rules, and the third is accepting it as a lifestyle change (O'Rourke, 2012).
She then goes into talking about her interactions with people's children who claim to not expect their parents to age. She claims that it’s because our culture is so obsessed with youth and miracle stories.
This TED Talk was interesting to watch as it highlights the reality of aging and the best ways to support those who are near the end of their lives. Instead of trying to “keep them young” and bring them back to who they once were, it’s better to accept what is happening and support them in whatever they want.
This video made me think about how much responsibility can fall on family members when an older parent begins to need more support. I found the idea of accepting aging as a lifestyle change especially interesting because it shifts the focus from trying to fix or reverse aging to finding ways to make everyday life easier and more comfortable. This connects to my research because family members may become caregivers without knowing how to properly support an aging parent. It made me think about the opportunity to create a product or resource that helps adult children understand what to expect, learn basic caregiving skills, and prepare for changes in their parents’ needs. Rather than only focusing on the older adult, I think there is also an opportunity to design for the family members who are helping care for them.
Reference
O'Rourke, A. (2012). How to relieve the stress of caring for an aging parent [Video]. YouTube. YouTube
